As the children and I planted our strawberry plants yesterday in the pots that grandpa bought them for Easter, I am bluntly reminded, probably for the fourth time yesterday, that my children are very independent. "No mom, you don't do it like this.....you do it like THIS!" Being said, of course, while the potting soil is being spread generously over my beautifully tended and healthy grass. I know, what's a little soil going to do, right? Well, it's not just that; I figure I am going to be *pleasantly* surprised in a couple of months when some strawberries begin to grow in that well manicured grass. And, then I'll have to fight the children as I try to replant it so I can mow the stinkin' grass around it. I'm not going to leave a mound of grass, dirt and strawberries in the middle of my yard. And, Heaven knows those kids are not going to let me move it without a fight.
I'm still debating with myself about whether Mackenzie is "good" at it, or "bad" at it, when it comes to wanting to be independent. She will stand her ground, arms crossed, scowl of the century on her face and refuse to budge if she is being asked to do something she doesn't want to do. Yeah, it's cute and all, but it's also enough to raise my blood pressure to steaming levels at times. This is where the drop and flail come in, along with a bloody murder scream that sends even the deafest person to their knees. (Mackenzie, not me) Amid all of her "ground standing" she's also the most communicative of all three of my girls. She E-N-U-N-C-I-A-T-E-S everything and makes sure you're listening. Think you can brush this one off? Not a chance!! She'll demand attention to the point of testing you to make sure you're paying very close attention to her (learned this the hard way.) She will ask you a direct question with the expectation that you'll answer her question correctly. If you don't, she'll call you on it. Now, coming from a 3 year old especially, this can be annoying - But, at the same time it reassures me that this little girl is going to be fine. She's going to have friends. She's going to be able to participate in groups well. She, is the person that many of us wish we could be; Direct, honest, clear, concise and despite her sometimes blatant disregard of my demands, she's as friendly as a kid could be.
Now, Rayla wants to be independent, too. But, not nearly as bad as Kenzie. Rayla will repeat her question LOUD and OBNOXIOUSLY until you've answered her. But, that's about as far as it goes. A good count to 3 gets Rayla moving in the appropriate direction - She doesn't like time out very well - And, since she has spent a fair amount of time there lately, I'm hoping that we move past this stage very, very soon.
I never knew potty training could be so stressful; I'm sure there is, but, for today, I can think of nothing worse than the painstaking task of potty training two toddler girls. I get so excited when they go in the potty, and then I get really excited when I think we're doing really well, and on the right track. Then, they regress right back to when we first began.....MONTHS ago. I've actually been half tempted to do some of the things that I've seen other people put on Facebook to try to potty train their children. I saw a picture one woman posted of her daughter, sitting on a potty chair, watching the TV with sippy cup in hand. I also saw a picture of someone asleep in the tub while their child was sitting on the potty. Somehow, "half tempted" can't bring me to such actions. I will not allow a potty to be in the living room, for obvious reasons. Food and drink is also not allowed in a child's hand while on the potty. Seems sensible, right? And, believe you, me, I will never sit long enough in a bathroom with a child on a pot for one or both of us to fall asleep. I can't say for sure if that's just me being lazy. But, there has to be some way to get through this!!! My children are so unpredictable that it's become nearly impossible to time it right. Like today, the girls pottied RIGHT before we walked out of the door to the Dentist office. We got to the office 15 minutes later and Rayla says "Mommy, I have to pee." Now, I was just signing them in, so she had to wait a whopping 10 seconds before we could go. By the time we got to the bathroom, 25 feet away, she had filled her pullup. Really!?!? Naturally, because I am an optimistic mommy, I left the pullup bag in the car thinking we could get through a 30 minute appointment without a pullup change. So, she bare assed it (with pants on) and I crossed my fingers and prayed that she wouldn't piss all over the Dentist's chair. She didn't, thank goodness!! But, you get my point. It's such a PAIN!
Looking back on when Katie was the twins' age, I can't remember potty training being this hard. And, quite possibly, it's because there are two children to train, not just one. But someone, you'd think that after 3 years of doing double of everything, I'd have this down. It seems that I don't. My definition of independence seems to have gotten a little skewed over the past few years...and it really has nothing to do with a solid definition set in a Webster's Dictionary. I have learned that independence is different for every one of us; And patience is a virtue.
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