Enlisted

Being a stay at home mother has lots of ups and downs. More ups than downs, though. One of my "go to" tasks, when I feel overwhelmed, is to make a list of things for certain reasons. List of things my children teach me, list of things that make me happy, list of things that I want to do while a stay at home mom are just a few of the things I've "listed." Today, I'm going to share with you one of such lists:

Things people in this household have learned this month

1.) Toddlers are quite capable of telling a fib. "I mean, seriously, that rank smell in your pants is NOT poop? And, yes, still, the cup you're holding upside down will dump the juice out. Please stop."

2.) I don't take my kids places enough. While driving to The Dalles yesterday the children were screeching in excitement over the rivers and trees they were seeing. It's not like they NEVER get out, but, jeez, they were acting like I've held them in a dungeon for years!

3.) I hate that damn cotton/polyester Halloween spider web decoration crap. I was an idiot to think that it was a good idea to have it in my home. And, that spider "web" we put up last week for decoration? Well, it now looks more like someone pulled the stuffing out of a pillow and stuck it on the window. :/

4.) My twins still think that the potty is where you go to sit and sing...not to actually use. "Oh, I just peed mom - I think it's time to go to the potty!........A, B, C, D, E....." I am still working vigilantly to see that they learn to pee IN the potty, and that's it's not meant as a reward throne.

5.) Apparently I was mistaken in thinking that books are to be read - My children seem to have created every other purpose for their books, other than reading. It's quite depressing.

6.) No matter how much I clean, my children will be right behind me dropping things like they're supposed to be there. "Uh, oh! Mommy's moving all our toys. After she vacuums, guys, lets put the toys back where she found them!! Silly, ol' mommy!!"

7.) If you haven't seen "Up All Night," the new TV show with Christina Applegate, then you should. Although they only have one child on the show, and we have 4, the thoughts that are put into their script are very much like the things that happen with me and Corey. You just might understand.

8.) The laundry will never get caught up. Ever. At least, not for 16 years at a minimum. Some article of clothing will always get put in the hamper right after I've loaded the last bundle of clothes into the washer. Always.

9.) It's not good to have a bad battery in your truck, while hunting on a mountain, at sunset, with no cell service. Yeah.

10.) Just because everyone liked that dinner I made once does not mean that they're going to like it again. In fact, the chances of that happening, ever, are slim to none.

11.) The children will always want whatever the other has. No matter how many toys this house is loaded with, they want THAT toy. It's the stupidest thing, and I don't know that I'll ever understand it. "This block, honey, is the SAME EXACT block that Kenzie has. No, it's not THAT block, but what's the difference? Oh, Kenzie has it, and that makes it special....that's the difference." For shits sake! Really?!?! lol

12.) "Screaming at me because you're angry at something does not help you get your way. It may get you a time out in your room - But it certainly won't make me give you what you want."

13.) "My sweet children, there is nothing in the garbage that should interest you. NOTHING. It may be colorful, it may have an odd odor, but you are never to investigate it's contents. Unless, that is, you've snuck into my room, taken my rings and decided that's where you're going to hide them."

Being a stay at home mother is by far the most isolating thing I've ever experienced. I talk to my kids so much that when I do get the chance to talk to an adult I probably sound like an idiot. But, if not for the opportunity to stay with my kids, I wouldn't get the chance to come to realizations like those above. And, because it could get depressing, I try to find the most comedic way to view my daily life. Not to say I haven't had my breakdowns - I have, and my poor husband has been at the forefront to bring me back to life. We all get worn down, torn down and depressed. We all have moments of ultimate sadness, moments of ultimate anger and moments of ultimate happiness. In the end, it's how we grasp those moments. It's how we respond to them. If there's one thing I know for sure, life is not perfect. But, the moments that create this life are. And without those perfect moments, I wouldn't be where I am today.

"FUN" damentals of Halloween

I LOVE cold weather! Let me rephrase; I LOVE Fall weather. The cool, crisp days that now envelope every moment of every day is something I look forward to every year. The leaves are turning colors The tractors are humming from moving bins of pears from here to there. The smell of freshly lit wood stoves surrounds my senses. FALL IS HERE! It absolutely is my favorite season.

Part of what I love about the Fall is Halloween. There's something so wonderful to the mysteries surrounding the holiday, and the way it's observed by people. Some people believe that Halloween was designed under religious form, and was just a way for demons to hide in plain sight among us. Ha....news doesn't lie. Those "demons" are all over the news every day. They don't hide. Some people celebrate with whimsical fun, much like my family. We get involved. We love the dress up, the pretending, and the fact that we can dress however we want and on this day nobody will judge us. I'm not saying that we enjoy dressing up like we live in Halloweentown all the time... It's just FUN!!

As a child I was always given the freedom to dress how I wanted. The first costume that I vividly remember was the one I wore while in Kindergarten. Remember it, I do..... Yoda, was I! I was so in love with all those Star Wars movies back then - And I loved Yoda. Another year I wanted to be a queen - In the early 80's it was commonplace for someone to make a costume for their children. My grandmother is a seamstress and was elated to make my queen costume. I remember a dress, a cape, and a crown made from cardboard and tin-foil. There is a picture, somewhere, of me staring into a mirror with this costume on, smiling from ear to ear - I guess all little girls have that "royal" dream at some point. Lucky for me, I have a husband who on occasion makes me feel like the Queen I dreamed of becoming when I was just a little girl. All together now "aawwwwww!"

The crazy costume carnival at our house began weeks ago. With the discovery of Halloween at ALL my children's hands this year, every one has expressed their completely different interests in dressing up. Cooper has changed his mind so many times this year that we've compared him to his big sister, who changes outfits ten times before leaving for school every day - First, he wanted to be Woody. Then, he wanted to be Buzz. But, if you know my son, he's VERY detail oriented and by the time he laid out all the things he "needed" in order to be Buzz, it was going to be a very expensive, and ridiculous, costume. And, by very, I'm talking hundreds of dollars and basically asking to be as "real" as Buzz could get. No way, no how - Twenty bucks tops in this household, and even that's pushing it! Four kids to dress up and parade around gets a little spendy. And, of course, there was no way in this modern day and age that he, or his father, would let me try to make that costume. Not that I could, anyways. I'm an awful seamstress. He went through every detail of this costume with us: He needed a jet pack, the plastic pop up wings, special white gloves, the helmet with the plastic cover, and the boots to go with it. THE boots, that is.....Not the covers, or the fake white boots. The REAL boots, and no place on this friggin' planet, except at maybe Universal Studios, made the boots he wanted. Therefore, Buzz was nixed. (I can't say I'm bummed about it)

Mario made the cut this year and I'm so excited to see him in full Mario get up.....YAY!! The girls battled for a while back and forth between princesses, and for a long time we were certain that Ray was going to be Rapunzel and Kenzie was going to be Cinderella.... But, then, Party express sent me a catalog of Halloween costumes, and our once already decided evening became a weeks long period of constant mind changing: Cowgirl, cat, spider, mouse, cow, Mario, witch, princess, ninja, goth bride, Pooh bear, Piglet, pirate, Tigger, Roo, Mickey, Minnie, Daisy, a dog, mom, Dorothy, Indian, cheerleader......Yeah, you get the point. They basically decided at every page that they wanted to be something ON that page. All dilemmas have been resolved, the costumes are now chosen and purchased, and now there's no going back - Pretty witch and Snow White will be on display on all Hallows Eve. Even Katie's going to dress up - But, I can't be sure exactly what she's going to be - Whatever it will be, it will be eclectic, wild, and whimsical - Kinda like the child she is! Halloween is going to be so much FUN when it finally gets here!

We're a fun bunch of people, for the most part. Corey and I love our children, and though I bring a strictness to us that helps to be scheduled, Corey brings out his inner child to help us be creative. A few nights ago before the kids settled for bed, we played duck, duck goose with the kids. Have any of you played this with 2 toddlers, a 4 year old and a 13 year old? It's a stinkin' mess. First of all, the teen child sits and reads while her head is patted. She's actually more of a prop for them - Always the duck, never the goose. She doesn't complain - In her eyes she's still playing with em'! Haha. But, every time one of the children yells out "Goose" and pats a head, they all run. And run, and run and run until someone sits and they all follow. This could take hours if they let it. Cooper gets the game, but the girls just see it as a chance to be chased - Even if they're the ones who are supposed to be doing the chasing. So, we run, all of us at times, in circles around our living room, through the kitchen and dining room, sometimes not stopping because the girls still think they're supposed to be chased. Our last "game" that evening concluded with all 6 of us running around the house, chasing each other over furniture with arms flailing. No one was it anymore, the goose was unknown and all the kids cared about was not getting tagged. Total chaos. And, Corey and I are not as lithe as we used to be. Couch hopping, spot diving and chasing children, who seem to have jets on their feet, is an exhausting feat. And, after the children all go to bed, we begin to feel the muscle spasms in our backs, our heads begin to pound and the Advil comes out. Oh, the joys of parenthood!

Or, just last night, Corey brought in a 15 foot long, 6 inch wide PVC pipe. You can only imagine how priceless the excitement and joy in their faces was! I wonder sometimes whether my husband is thinking straight when he does things for our children. But, every time, in the end all the children are happy - He can tap into that inner child of his unlike anyone I've ever seen. He can think of things the kids would love to do, probably because he'd love to do them, too. I do believe, now, that I was probably over sheltered as a child - I can be creative, but not near as creative as him. So, the PVC pipe was in the living room. Of course, having this brought in just before bed didn't thrill me at first, but the kids acted like they were at Disneyland with it. The rolled cars down and watched them shoot out of the opposite end. They played teeter totter on it - And we discovered that all three children are too heavy to have on it at the same time (imagine that.) They hung on it, slid on it, climbed like monkeys up it, raced cars on it, balanced on it and even rolled it like a log (unintentional) at times. All this for an hour. The mother in me was more concerned about which child was going to get a black eye, which one would knock out their teeth when they attempted to jump over it, and whether or not there were spiders in it that would now be running around our house. (the pipe came from outside in the shop) But, boy, did they have fun. I never would have thought to bring in PVC pipe. I suppose I'll leave that up to Corey....and I don't think I'll get any arguments out of that.

In preparation for Halloween we have carved some pumpkins, baked the seeds and have displayed our house with that stupid cotton spider web stuff that, once touched, never seems to want to let you go. The children are fascinated with it, and mostly became so when they noticed it on display at Walmart, strung above all the registers and riddled with plastic spiders and bugs. Naturally, we got some plastic bugs, too. But, I'm short - So short that for years my daughter told people that I was a midget - and I couldn't reach the ceilings to put this clothes clinging crap across. And, ladders are not my favorite things. So, instead, it's covering our living room windows. The kids can reach it to place bugs and other random toys in, and pull it apart for pure curiosity. Choose your battles, right?

Less than 2 weeks now to Halloween so I better start getting some treats mastered. If there's anything I can do at Halloween, it's treats! And, if anyone has any awesome treat recipes that you'd like to share, I'd love to have them!

Happy Halloween to all from our monster house to yours!!